I don't wanna..

I don't wanna realize it's only me keeping us together.
I don't wanna realize I love you so much more.
I don't wanna realize I was the one stopped you from pushing me to break up.
I don't wanna realize you ever decided to walk away.
I don't wanna realize I'm just there to fill your hours.
I don't wanna realize you don't care about so many things that hurts me.
I don't wanna realize I got you so close to me,so close that I can't let you go now.
I don't wanna realize I will be the weakest person alive without you.
I don't wanna realize I'm not really your everything.
I don't wanna realize you don't think about me.
I don't wanna realize you didn't fell in love like crazy with me.
I don't wanna realize how you act cold when something goes wrong.
I don't wanna realize those moments you weren't afraid of letting me go.
I don't wanna realize how easy it is for you to move on.
I don't wanna realize how your reactions affects my emotions.
I don't wanna realize that I'm miserable without you.
I don't wanna realize that you didn't spend time for me.
I don't wanna realize so many things.
I actually..
Don't wanna realize,
that I'm blind.

I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be...
A murderer